So, I again haven’t written in my blog for no reason just crazy stuff. I offered for clients an open call as needed I am sorry to say it has come to bite me. I had folks be abusive, one telling me how I am burnt off in actually she needed too much as a low price. Another woman told me I got this lousy job because of you then quit for a very low monthly charge which she would usually have at least 2 sessions a week. So, no I am setting stronger boundary’s it has been beyond annoying plus being accused of being burnt out which I love supporting you why I made myself more available as needed, I have learned the hard way that isn’t appreciated by several in 1 week.
So enough of that ………
It has been a challenge with society of our own grief plus my mom’s she is being amazing showing me all the time how she is here to support me in very obvious ways. I have connected with Ichenge lin who lost his partner Ray very suddenly we have been doing podcast The Mountain Called also addressing the medicine wheel and chakra’s. It has been very powerful both experiencing the same grief plus having them show up at the most necessary moments for support plus pushing us out there after experiencing this isolated time with the Pandemic but folks feeling grief to the world not defining it. We can because we both have specific circumstances plus worldwide.
I again had made the commitment to go back to Peru to put more prayers down but after Mom’s passing it was difficult to even think about it ………..I had a physical symptom of SI joint unable to walk constant pain, and limping so going to hike in Peru would be impossible. I attempted to go to MD’s and massage, chiropractors to no avail I finally found a chiro sport medicine who guided me which I was very thankful but it still took forever to get back. I found I have to walk 3-5 miles to maintain healthy body.
I had made plans to go to Peru but 12-20, 2021 at 2:22 to change my plans of going to Peru which I did then rescheduled for September costing me another bunch of money. Started advertising in the summer end up getting 6 great folks it was amazing sharing facilitating with long time client who was living there became a challenge she had never done groups before and kept disappearing plus moody. I didn’t realize till I was alone in Cusco I had been with people 24 hours a day for 13 days finally feeling some relief and being able to explore the city center the next day. It too me a month to digest what had gone on a great trip in many ways reconnecting with awesome teachers but I have shared facilitating with many folks never experiencing anything like this. My last trip I had arrange through Jesus he took care of everything except the last few days which I did. It is really my fault I didn’t aske the right questions assuming in the 4 agreement it was going go smoothly. I really did private sessions almost daily to calm folks down we didn’t have hot water everyone was very kind. I had taken a class in Oct 2021 with Christine Kloser once again, realizing why I had stopped writing my book with the heart ache & trauma of losing my building my guarantied retirement …..which I had to get out of debt. I then being determined to finish this book which I did before this trip done Sept. just needing to have someone help put the chapters together Jennifer said she would gladly do it but didn’t but did finally as I sit in Cusco charging me $150 for supposing 3 hours of work, I was checking with a local guy then instantly I got her email? What would be a very exciting time down was given a dark hue. Not sure why she has such a odd reality? Plus, on this trip odd communication which didn’t make sense. As I write this makes me very sad that another long-time client is acting out not even sure why?
It took me a whole month to even begin to reflect on what had gone on not with participants but co-facilitator she was often gone and coming back to group very grouchy.
Once getting home had a New Moon Fire ceremony with Ichenge lin and Annie at my home, one day after I got a message to go on the mountain to my sacred rock where I received my home in San Carlos it was a Saturday knowing to follow directions. I didn’t even comb my hair when up had realized I need to get water for myself from lower Panther Spring water I had assisted my 2 clients to raise their energy. I am now doing it for myself. Still figuring this current jaunt to Peru and its complexity. Then the next assignment was to call for a Sweat Lodge which I also had not done for 3 years since the Pandemic, so a plan we set up on a Thursday to start prayers early for the world and people with tobacco. Asking a very small group to honor the memorial of my Mom, Ray, another Ray, Amy people we knew of plus Philip Goggin who’s grandad lived in my house finding out by his sister just the day before I had met him just a few months before had dropped dead at 52………of course deaths from pandemic and Ukraine, I also made it clear we needed optimistic new beginnings! I had made special food in celebration but waking the morning of the lodge I was having trouble understanding we were really doing this but once I started the fire It felt positive happening. Everyone was very glad to be here for this ceremony finally~
Plus, very exciting to be working on publishing my book build new clients plus get funding for Copusia easily, it is really done 44,000 words. Now starting my second book with great people speaking advertising which I love doing~